The first of the this show probably will be a good reflection of what I will be going through. This short film is very sweet in a way. How love shows itself in the strangest way.
Before I set off to this engagement (I shall call it the Tupperware engagement), my mind was screaming "Argggg this Tupperware is
going to leave a stain my career life~~though it's not as bad as GFS~~"
Two weeks to do fieldwork?!?! TOC and finals?!?! I dint know we booked 3 partners, 6 managers, 12 seniors and 24 assistants for this Tupperware. Of course I am blowing it out of proportion... I am so complaining right now that my sense of proportions and reasonableness ~~looks around for anal auditors~~ are skewed terribly to appeal to the irrational biasness of people. Make that 50 partners!
Irrationality aside, this Tupperware challenged me on many fronts. Firstly, I had to share a room with ES. Not eveningsong... But the senior on the job. I have to share 11 nights with an slightly friendish acquintant. I can't hide my distain for the awefully evolved human race from him. I'm a nutshell, a cliquey irresponsible way to absolve myself from explaining myself, I have to let him see me in my most ungraceful prose.
Secondly, the demand from Tupperware is not exactly Redway-ish. There are so many things to do and on top of that I have spend like 1.5 days on Redway. 12 days less 1.5 days less 1 day for confirmations less friday & monday. Oh and 1 day R&R @ dongmen. 6.5 effective working days. I am so amazed. To be fair, it's no-one's fault. It's how Tupperware decided to vent their frustration on us. Its all about $$$$. Fine. Character building......
One most important thing that I have gained from this trip is the bonds that the four of us have built and cemented. I got to know more things about them and to have lived with them especially ES. Remind me again why I love my current job. If only 鬼影, Um Um, Slutty Tiong and Ah Pui are not here.......I am so good at nicknaming people.......
There are many ugly truths. I witnessed one this morning. The flight to Xiamen was delayed from 9.05am to 12pm. This caused many hoo-haas among the people. They believed that by shouting and threatening they can get what they want. I am disgusted and at the same time, telling myself that this is the way of life here.
I believe that they are only wasting their time and the correct thing to do is to enquire for another way out.
Well, I am stuck at the airport for well over 5 hours.
Heading to Shenzhen in less than an hour's time. Currently eating at Wang's. Decided to forgo starbucks due to the queue.
Feeling a bit comprehensive. And tired. And aches.
Taking silkair again. As again it's an expensive budget airline.
Labels: kenActivities, kenPlaces, kenWork
Continuing from this post......
I just came back from a strange long trip that has invigorated my spirit. Having lost touch with myself today, I panicked. It was a depressing day as I saw the time just flow away, like how Kronus swallowed his children. The personification of Time was a grim reminder that he is limitless and yet limited. I always believed that Time is only a concept imprinted onto everything on this earth. Why? We are limited. We have a limited lifespan. There is only so much we can achieve. We are imprisoned by this constant notion of death. Time, hence, becomes a very important concept.
I hate the feeling of wasting Time.
I hate the myself for so wantonly and blatantly let Time pass.
I have a very weak control of myself. I let myself down many a times. The feeling of disappointing myself is far greater than anything. The nudging thought of "am I really good for this world?" "What have I achieved?"
Just this evening, I started walking away from my home and towards somewhere. This somewhere was an unknown to me and I really have no idea where was I heading. As I walked, I saw new things. Parts of Queenstown that lay eluded from the day-to-day life. I walked for a good 1.5 hours.
During this time, I was refreshed. I am a person that is easily bored. And I appreciate life and what it has to offer. I embraced new things readily and hungrily. This walk woke me once more.
There is so many things that I really want to do. For one, I want to learn photography. I want to capture and create images that touch people. That makes people see a different view. I want to have a book published. "Ken you see?" is the title. I want to take photographs of places no-one would even remember that exists in Singapore. Little obscure corners. Buildings that we have forgotten. Trees and railway tracks. Misty meadows. I want people to stop and for that short moment as they see the photographs, to have the same feeling as I did this evening. Wow, there are so much more things.......
Yes.
The life bug is biting me. I have come to a point where Time is a serious consideration. No longer can I say... "I have a few good years more to waste". That was 3 years ago.
What to do? Where to go? How to achieve? When to make all these happen?
Labels:
kenThoughts
There come a point where doing work is progressively harder. There are expectations to meet and live up to. The constant stress forces me to rethink my life again. Here I am, whining constantly at how pathetic is my life instead of actively reinvigorating it.
If I was a third person, I would laugh at myself. I am given so much resources and yet I squander at of them away. I am lazy and ill-disciplined and I wonder how I made it here?
Perhaps there is something in me to push me, at which I took everything for granted.
Similarly, just I would lament how my youth was lost. I would do the same thing 5 years down the road. What ifs being my best buddy. I have learnt that we can't go back in time. And to carpe diem. What if I can't even seize my own sanity.
They say sloth is one of the seven sins. I now see how is it a sin. The sin of laziness and to waste what God has given us. Our stay on this earth is really short. Like a novel, which one day will be flipped to the last page.
I need to Regain control of myself. Until then all my words are just words.
Labels: kenThoughts
I have jus purchased this app on the iTunes store to help me to just blog about anything. This should be more of a tweet or plurks but I jus wanna test the thing out!
Isn't she cute?
But what are her parents thinking?
I think once in a while, there will be some one bitten by the travel bug. For me, it is not only the travel bug but also the life bug. The urge and frustration to sort out the clouds in my life. I have been thinking, what is my life about? Death is there waiting. I don't know what is there beyond him and honestly I am scared. Yea.
And I having reading and watching shows on the end times. Lost book of Nostradamus, the galactic alignment in 2012, and the grim future ahead. Which brings me to another question, do modern humans have what it takes to survive a catastrophe and to rebuild the civilisation?
Throughout history, there were devastating events occurring and somehow humans managed to live on and recreate the civilization. Imagine, if the yellowstone super volcano blows tomorrow, the lives that we are so used to and taken for granted will forever be altered.
Yea.
The economy will surely break down. The society view of normalcy will break down.
I am getting so out of point. Can't concentrate on writing a post when the guild is wiping on Naxx. Brb in next post.
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